Finding God in Public

I feel a strong need to write, even that there is something important that I need to write down, but I don’t know what it is!

One of the pieces is the now clear awareness that I am no longer in the place of deep belly sobbing that I was in, and that more than a few are still there now.

I was there then because of my broken bones…
And knowing that I’ve lost contact with that place is important. Because I see how very differently the world looks when one is looking from that place!!
[As it is also “different” when one looks on from one of those psalms…]

I’ve not let go of what for me is still in a way a failed attempt to get the scholars to address my questions from Oct.. And that I didn’t send them the questions again, was a big error. Again, I still don’t know what to do about that either. Just let it go,…as though it’s not a problem? I wrote to them from my deep belly place …and no one noticed? (Sounds like the horses in the NYT article of today.)

The good thing is that I feel no desperation about any of it…

Not Today… I feel “even” hopeful at the moment. At the moment. Yesterday was another story…. Realizing who 47 is appointing and how much damage it MAY cause. Perhaps I did that yesterday…and amazingly, my decision to cook fabulous food instead of watching the news as someone suggested on FB,,,turned my attention away from it and towards our beautiful Shabbat table with luscious Manchego Souffle and a salad of baby greens, pears and bay shrimp. (Clearly not kosher)

The lack of resolution with X…leaves a huge question hanging in my life.

What do we do, how do we not misuse our knowledge, education, advantages. Etc.? Is it possible to have such things and for their impact in our lives not to divide us from those who do not have them?

The Horse article…. It’s the reason why the horse bolted that needs attention, not the bolting. It’s the reasons why people voted for 47 that we need to pay attention to . Thus D Brooks’ book… on how know others deeply. We don’t know each other on “our side” at St A’s…enough to have even something of an idea as to why they voted as they did. Let alone… those who voted for 47.

Why or how is it that we know each other so little?

First Night in a Tent at Grandcamp PapaNanny

We wanted to do things WITH our grandchildren that we would all remember.

For various resons, they won’t forget last night. Our granddaughter, 9, went to an Olivia Rodrigo concert with our daughter, in “America.” (We enjoyed the pictures.)

We stayed home with our grandson, almost 6, hoping to spend the night sleeping outside in a tent for his first time. (Hope may be too strong a word. We knew that it was iffy.)

It was unquestionably memorable, but perhaps not for the reasons we had hoped. At least two weeks ago, my husband hauled out the still-in-good-shape 50 yr old tent, the kind you-can-stand-up-in. He pitched it in the field on the other side of the swale outside the dining room doors, near the Alder, where we can just barely see it through the trees.  It is the tent we used in 1972 when we moved back to the Pacific Northwest from San Diego.

And now, we are both near 80. We approached this event with a fair bit of experience and a false sense of confidence. Only the almost 6-year-old managed to actually sleep in the tent. We spent a night in anticipation of elusive sleep, and eager listening to the cries of coyotes, various owls, a dog down the road and intermittent flocks of cars recently arrived on the ferry.

With hind sight, we now see that we must have done just about everything wrong that one could do for a 1st night in a tent. First of all, we were SO tired from trying to keep up with this childhood energy we don’t have, that we were ready for bed long before dark.  And, since our grandson was anxious to try out the tent, we moved in at least an hour before dark. Too soon.

After more than a bit of my agitation earlier on about the children’s use of tablets during their visits with us, it was NOT a mistake to bring along my tablet with a just-right book of “Scary Stories for 7 Yr Olds”. Our grandson was very sure that he wanted scary stories in the tent. And I was very clear that I don’t actually know any. Before heading outside to the tent, we had  done an extensive search for a suitable eBook.  Together, we found this just-right-level of scary stories. The very smart almost 6 yr old could easily see that any book labeled “Scary Stories for 6 Yr. Olds” was not at all scary for him. 

We were off to a good beginning. Between the two of us, we read five of the scary stories. They were just right… scary enough, but not too much. And it was still not dark enough for real scary, so one of the trips to the “bathroom/ bushes”, turned into a Flashlight Exploration Adventure. He finally came back.

The actual fall into sleep took more than a bit of waiting, and some hugs. But, once the waiting and the hugs took effect, he fell into a sleep so deep that not even our bright head lamps could disturb him. That became evident when we had to move him to the middle “cot.”   He had fallen asleep on my arm. Then, once moved to his own “cot,” he was sleeping so deeply that as he curled up into a little ball, leaning away from the back of the “zero gravity chair,”  the previously flat “bed” became an upright chair, partially pushing him off.  Nevertheless, bright lights, being moved from one place to another, pushing off his covers, our quiet talking, and all, he slept for close to 7 hours. We did not.

We, who thought we knew something about sleeping in tents, and given how old both we and the tent were, had miscalculated various aspects of this memorable night.

The red chairs that are marvelous for lounging in the shade of the porch are not marvelous for sleep. My husband could not get comfortable, and tried valiantly to “stick it out”, but was the 1st to abandon the tent and return to the comforts of a real bed around 2 am. I, who am still recovering from a broken pelvis, can’t yet comfortably sleep on my side, so attempting sleep in the red chair was “fine” once I got a second layer of blankets. I was comfortable., or so I thought. And, along with keeping track of my co-sleepers,  was thrilled by the experience of the slow arrival of darkness and quiet. 

Once the lights were off, I saw only full darkness. Nothing more. But, not long afterward realized how much I could see from this tent on the edge of a field in the woods of South Whidbey Island, WA. It continued to be a surprise each time I looked up into the tall trees I am used to seeing from the side. Out of the mesh window above my “cot”  I saw the 100′ tall trees, and then some stars and possibly a planet. Even if I couldn’t sleep, I could and did savor the place,  the sounds, the view. Even with all of that, I did not sleep in the tent.

Even though it was August, it was much colder than we had thought, and the lightweight quilts we used as covers did not keep us warm.

Just about 4 am, there was subtle movement next to me. Our grandson was beginning to wake up. More than beginning. He was actually fully awake and was ready to go into the house. For him, 4 am is his usual 7 am waking time at home. He was both able and proud to lead me via the “shortcut” through the field back into the house. And then, I suspect, quietly but quickly disappeared into the guest room to play some video game. He must have fallen sleep later on. He was still asleep in his bed at 8:30 when I work up in my bed.

Even if we remember this night in very different ways, we have a day to remember. And laugh at, and learn from.

THE LADDER OF HUMILITY

9/12/23

The ladder of humility is not pretty,

or even sturdy enough to hold up

leaning up against a wall or anything else

The ladder of humility lies on its side, in pieces,

in a field of question marks, exclamation points, #####’s

and other indications of distress and disruption

The ladder is made from fragments of

missed exits, entrances, and marks,

misread signs and cues

revealed illusions, attempts, and failures

and Ahas! of the most inconvenient kinds

This ladder is painted the color of awkward silence

that comes with looking into the eyes of whom or whatever it was

that you claimed, believed, hoped, or insisted

was the least, the most, the best, the worst

until you realized that you had it backwards, again.

The ladder of humility is v—e—r–y …….  l—o—n—-g,

And most likely to appear in the form of a spiral, corkscrew

or roller coaster.

At the bottom, rather than the top,

of the Ladder of Humility is a sacred space,

as hard to imagine as the inside of your heart

A terrain in which all that seemed to matter so very much,

in a life well done is reduced to actual size

as not at all important,

completely outweighed, and overwhelmed

by the most simple

present before your eyes

calm, step back into peace.    

SERMON APRIL 3, 2022,   St. Augustine’s in the Woods, Episcopal Church,

Langley WA Kathryn Rickert

Anja Rožen, a 13-year-old elementary school student from Slovenia is the winner of the international contest Plakat MIRU. She was chosen among 600,000 children from all over the world. “My poster represents the earth that connects and unites us. People stick to each other. If one person let go, the rest will fall. We are all connected to our planet and to each other, but unfortunately we are little aware of it,” said the young creator. (See V. Lambergar, 24 hrs. with) 👏👏👏  from Facebook

What is the New Thing God is doing now?

“It” is almost over… this 5^th week of Lent, in the 3^rd Lent of the Long Lent that began in 2020, It, Lent, Winter and Covid is Almost over. Almost. So, what do we need now that “it” is almost over?

Almost, but not quite. People are still getting sick, and the war in Ukraine, and other tragic situations are not over, yet.

Of the many spiritual resources we might gain from these readings for this time of almost over, HOPE is the one that appeals to me the most.

These lessons fit within the category of what Bishop Stephen Charleston calls the “poetry of hope,” something we probably take an interest in mostly, only when hope seems to be endangered.

This “poetry of hope” holds out to us some powerful antidotes with which to resist clouds of discouragement that we see in many directions. The poetry of hope offers us alternative images to take into our souls, to feel within our bodies, so as to work against and replace those others images and feelings of hopelessness, disease, war, and disruption, which are not so far away.

While hope is one of the strongest offerings in these lessons, there certainly are others that I will not attempt to deal with.

Those include – pondering what it means in the Gospel when it says, “the poor you will always have with you, but you do not always have me?” 

But rather, here I would like to invite you to imagine the fragrance of that outrageously expensive ointment that the woman with the alabaster jar pours on Jesus feet, imagine it in a way that is compelling to you,

…imagine that fragrance, hold on to it. And use it as a place holder for the hope that we are seeking. (As in Christ our Hope.)

Our search for hope becomes weighed against how woven together “we” are with the whole world. And when “we” means the whole world,  for that is who Jesus cares about, How do “we” have hope and look forward to something better, something new, when there is still so much suffering going on?

How do we have hope when there is so much suffering unrecognized and unlamented?

When the situation looks to be impossible, unprecedented, outrageous, way out far beyond what we know how to deal with, even crazy, how do we have hope?

Our Christian faith suggests three things here:

We will pay attention, with God’s help,  (as in paying attention as a form of prayer) to all that is going around us, good and bad.

We will, with God’s help, ask these difficult questions, from time to time,

and, again with God’s help,  we will continue to live in the Hope offered to us by our God, even in the face of what looks to be impossible.

When we look at these stories (OT and NT) that we have known for a long time, we notice…that God’s promises of hope, help, redemption, reconciliation, rescue, love,…

all along, have been about HOPE in the face of completely impossible, unrealistic, and unpresented situations, entirely against the odds.

Our God is the God of the impossible, the God who offers hope in the face of the impossible —          

                …it was like a dream, it seemed impossible, etc.

           Our God who makes a way through the sea,

          sends water where there is no water,

          turns people who are weeping into those who rejoice

The reading sounds so “normal” when we hear it. It does not sound outrageous. But it is outrageous.

It might help us to back up through more of a Hebrew rather than English understanding of these words, and hear this as

          Our God, with our participation, does what cannot be done…

          builds roads for walking on in the ocean,

          makes water gush about in a place that has not seen water in years..

          protects us in situations where we cannot protect ourselves from,

                     a dangerous and violent enemy   

          and is recognized for doing so by the most unlikely of sources!!

          And furthermore, reminds us of this all within an intimate setting, a tender  exchange says …

          (Listen for the tone of voice. What is the tone of voice saying about God?)

          Yes, we have had some “issues in the past,” some unresolved                                         disagreements, but, let that go, I have dealt with it.

          Let us move on together in our loving, relationship and together, we will do something New.

          Let us notice the “together” part. God’s part is the offer of hope,

          and our part has to do with noticing what God is doing, entering into these New ways that God is making, together.

          We are not going back to the same old-same old, and the New will be far beyond anything we can ask, imagine, or plan for. …

So, a promise of hope based on God’s reminder, and tender conversation is ours.

Thus armed with hope, while also acknowledging the high level of challenge as we look forward to the end of these hard times, and to a joyful celebration of the Feast of the Resurrection at Easter,  .? just what are we looking for, expecting, etc.

The hope offered is not a promise of a return to things as they were before.,,

          Pre-Exilic                                    Exile                       Post-Exilic

          Life of Jesus /before the Death & Resurrection   Post-Resurrection

          before Covid                             Covid                    Post-Covid

The promise of hope, was/ is to something better, rather to take us back to the good old days, to return to where we were before all of this started, as though none of this has happened, as though we have not learned anything from all of this suffering, those of others and our own.

Let us not waste the suffering. (Marlene Kropf) “Waste” meaning to not learn from, not be transformed by, become caused to grow in awareness, compassion, and wisdom by paying attention to our own suffering and that of others.

For it is the places in-between the before and after pictures where the new life comes into being.

It is while wandering in the wilderness, before entering the promised land.

It is in Exile, away from home and before returning there,

it is between the Life and the Death & Resurrection.

that hope is born to arise later on.

The Hope is a promise of something better, something NEW!

Let us ask ourselves… what have we learned over this Long Lent?

and…what are the “new things” that God is doing now;

what we are looking for, seeing, witnessing to for this Easter?

Before, I thought faith was more about maintaining the traditions of the past, meaning… that our goal now would be to return to a time, place, or ways of being just as they were before. But now, I am seeing again that faith all along is about finding, noticing, witnessing what happened, learning from Exile, Lent, Covid, death and helping to bring about what is “new,” new life now.

… we are called to noticing, paying attention to, witnessing to, and participating in…. whatever are the new “ways that God is making” Now!

And exactly what are the New ways that God is making now? I do not know. But the patterns for those New ways are to be found in the past. And I do see, believe that those new things are springing up among us here, and around the world.  

Whatever this New way may be, these New things will have the same characteristics, and qualities of justice, mercy, wisdom, compassion, kindness, humility, and love,..the kinds of spiritual powers that bring out and sustain tremendous courage, integrity, and vision under the worst of circumstances.

And likely, these new things will appear in forms that are strange, unfamiliar, and certainly unexpected, and unprecedented.

This unexpected and unprecedented is our link to the Gospel  today– of the many characteristics we might observe about Jesus, doing things the way we have always done them before, is NOT one of them.

In a time, a hard time, when the whole world, and we here on this island are in need of hope, we’ve been reminded to look for the New Things that God is doing, reminded by the One who remembers what has been forgotten.   (meaning, we can let that go)

This offer of hope held out to us this day is like the fragrance of that outrageously expensive ointment, used by the woman with the alabaster jar to anoint the feet of Jesus, to prepare him for his burial.

It is invisible, controversial, powerfully beautiful, long lasting, and inescapable. May our Hope be so.

May we rejoice together as we see the New things that God is doing among us, now. Amen.  

Sunday Scriptures, Epiphany 4C January 30^th, 2022

Jeremiah 1:4-10   Psalm 71:1-6  1 Corinthians 13:1-13   Luke 4:21-30

(A Study guide based on the Revised Common Lectionary)

For Reflection: It is striking how much our current situation contributes to what we hear/ don’t hear, in these readings. What do we find here that helps to keep us going in these difficult days?  Something powerful happens when we recognize,

            –”Yes, that there, the part about— not being afraid, taking refuge in God, not being shamed, love is missing or  isn’t arrogant, or Jesus passing through the midst an angry, arguing mob, and went his way –

that is what I felt when X happened in my life. Or, that is what I needed when Y was going on.”

1. What speaks to your heart in these readings this week? (2 -3 sentences)
2. What does it mean to shelter in God? (Psalm 71)
3. If Jeremiah’s call from God is “typical”, what does that kind of call look like? What’s it about? Who receives that kind of call today?
4. How does love behave according to I Cor. 13? Where do you see that around you?
5. This week’s Gospel sounds something like a scene from an old TV Western, where Jesus is the strong, silent courageous but very unpopular hero in danger. What do you make of that?
6. To what is God calling you this week?
7. What is your prayer for this week?

Jeremiah 1:4-10   Common English Bible

4 The Lord’s word came to me:5 “Before I created you in the womb I knew you;     I made you a prophet to the nations.”6 “Ah, Lord God,” I said, “I don’t know how to speak because I’m only a child.”

7 The Lord responded,

    “Don’t say, ‘I’m only a child.’

        Where I send you, you must go;

        what I tell you, you must say.

8 Don’t be afraid of them,

    because I’m with you to rescue you,”

        declares the Lord.

9 Then the Lord stretched out his hand,

    touched my mouth, and said to me,

    “I’m putting my words in your mouth.

10 This very day I appoint you over nations and empires,

    to dig up and pull down to destroy and demolish, to build and plant.”

Psalm 71:1-6  ROBERT Alter translation

1 In you, O God, I shelter;

    let me never be shamed.

2 Through your bounty save me and free me,

Incline your ear to me and rescue me.

3 Be for me a fortress dwelling,

to come into always.

You ordained to rescue me,

for you are my rock and my bastion.

4 My God, free me from the hand of the wicked,

    from the grip of the [unjust and cruel.]

5 For you are my hope, [O God]

    my refuge from my youth.

6 Upon you I  relied from birth;

    From my mother’s womb You brought       me out. To You is my praise always.

1 Corinthians 13:1-13  Common English Bible

If I speak in tongues of human beings and of angels but I don’t have love, I’m a clanging gong or a clashing cymbal. 2 If I have the gift of prophecy and I know all the mysteries and everything else, and if I have such complete faith that I can move mountains, but I don’t have love, I’m nothing. 3 If I give away everything that I have and hand over my own body to feel good about what I’ve done but I don’t have love, I receive no benefit whatsoever.

4 Love is patient, love is kind, it isn’t jealous, it doesn’t brag, it isn’t arrogant, 5 it isn’t rude, it doesn’t seek its own advantage, it isn’t irritable, it doesn’t keep a record of complaints, 6 it isn’t happy with injustice, but it is happy with the truth. 7 Love puts up with all things, trusts in all things, hopes for all things, endures all things.

8 Love never fails. As for prophecies, they will be brought to an end. As for tongues, they will stop. As for knowledge, it will be brought to an end. 9 We know in part, and we prophesy in part; 10 but when the perfect comes, what is partial will be brought to an end. 11 When I was a child, I used to speak like a child, reason like a child, think like a child. But now that I have become a man, I’ve put an end to childish things. 12 Now we see a reflection in a mirror; then we will see face-to-face. Now I know partially, but then I will know completely in the same way that I have been completely known. 13 Now faith, hope, and love remain—these three things—and the greatest of these is love.

Luke 4:21-30  La Biblia de las Américas

21 Y comenzó a decirles: Hoy se ha cumplido esta Escritura que habéis oído.

22 Y todos hablaban bien de Él y se maravillaban de las palabras llenas de gracia que salían de su boca, y decían: ¿No es este el hijo de José?

23 Entonces Él les dijo: Sin duda me citaréis este refrán: «Médico, cúrate a ti mismo»; esto es, todo lo que oímos que se ha hecho en Capernaúm, hazlo también aquí en tu tierra.

24 Y dijo: En verdad os digo, que ningún profeta es bien recibido en su propia tierra.

25 Pero en verdad os digo: muchas viudas había en Israel en los días de Elías, cuando el cielo fue cerrado por tres años y seis meses y cuando hubo gran hambre sobre toda la tierra; 26 y, sin embargo, a ninguna de ellas fue enviado Elías, sino a una mujer viuda de Sarepta, en la tierra de Sidón. 27 Y muchos leprosos había en Israel en tiempos del profeta Eliseo, pero ninguno de ellos fue limpiado, sino Naamán el sirio. 28 Y todos en la sinagoga se llenaron de ira cuando oyeron estas cosas, 29 y levantándose, le echaron fuera de la ciudad, y le llevaron hasta la cumbre del monte sobre el cual estaba edificada su ciudad para despeñarle. 30 Pero Él, pasando por en medio de ellos, se fue.

Sermon –  Sunday Scriptures Proper 25 B October 24^th

^{St. Augustine’s in the Woods, Freeland, WA}

 Jeremiah 31:7-9 and Psalm 126  • Hebrews 7:23-28  Mark 10:46-52

Over the past few weeks, in the readings from both the Gospel of Mark and the OT, I’ve noticed a pattern of strategic intimate conversations between Jesus and those who follow him, between God and Israel.

One party approaches, makes a comment or asks a question,                                                                the 2nd party listens and then responds to the question or comment                                                                            

the 1^st party waits, listening to the reply, and only then replies               the 2nd party listens and only then, replies… and so on

          Jesus, Son of David, show me mercy

          What do you want me to do for you?

In these strategic intimate conversations what happens in the rest of that story      depends entirely upon the answers and replies.                                                                                      In these conversations, there is something for each party to say,                                    something for each to listen to, and                                                                                                    some response called for from everyone.

No one is left out as a silent, passive observer.

(Including the followers around Jesus in this story, and we who hear this hear today.)                       None of the parties  –  Jesus, his followers, the Prophet, Israel, God, and we here – 

          – assumes that they know what the other party is going to say, 

   and what happens depends upon what they do say, and do.

And all of this unfolds in public, out loud. Nothing hidden about any of this.

So, today I would like to offer something of a “strategic intimate conversation” that might be useful to us as a congregation, in the hope that many of us will have this conversation in the future.        

How Was your Covid?

         Not long after the end of WWII in the UK,  it was not usual to greet someone you hadn’t seen since the war with the question, “How was your war?”… As heard in the title, Foyle’s War.

That question acknowledged that it wasn’t the same war experience for everyone. Depending upon a whole lot of things,  but especially the things that make for diversity and oppression, and particular circumstances,

that war, and now Covid, were and are different experiences for each person who lives through them.

These strategic intimate conversations could be useful to us as a parish as we search for a new rector, if they help to not fear our differences, but rather see them as gifts and strengths.

This is not to come up with some consensus about Covid, but the opposite. So that we can see more clearly that being united, One in the Spirit, is more about being like-hearted, than like-minded.

We are One Body in Christ, even when we understand that in different ways.

[ I still hope and believe that ]as Americans, we can be what we claim to be,                 E pluibus Unem, from many, one.

The “things” that make for like heartedness and feed our souls, allowing us to remain in community

come not from agreement on points x, y, and z,

but because we care about the same kinds of questions, that often have very different answers.

For, we all can hear the question that Jesus asks Bartimaeus…

”What do you want me to do for you?” And yet, we each have a different answer.

It is my hunch that it is our questions, and the bonds (Holy Strings) that created when we hear the differences between our answers, which forms us into a community.

How as your war? How was your Covid?

In answer the question, “How was your Covid?” I am going to play a song,

Everything Must Change. That song is my initial response to How was your Covid?

Then I’ll tell you what has kept me afloat for more than a year now, my on-going spiritual snacking program on soul-food. 

Everything Must Change by Bernard Eighner, 1974 https://www.soultracks.com/story-benard-ighner-dies

Depending upon how many people you know who died, and were or still are sick, lost their jobs, loved ones, homes, careers, community life, access to what they care about, (church, sports, art, music), this has been the worst of times.

And for others, for whom these days have become an extended spiritual retreat, these have been the best of times.

How will telling our Covid stories contribute to our search for a new Rector?

Today, our collect mentionsfaith, hope and love as gifts rather than accomplishments,

things we receive and then figure out how to use in life-giving ways, to provide hope and vision – important kinds of sight – to a world with a supply chain problem low on hope and vision.

When we share these stories, we remove some of the barriers between us, and  allow each other glimpses our most pressing questions. With those glimpses, these gifts of faith, hope and love become manifest as a kind of Holy Strings of compassion, dismay,  wonder, gratitude, awe, …. As in religio… that is what religion of any kind does, it binds people together with Holy Strings. Together not necessarily because they agree or even are likeminded in all things, but because we care about each other, the Creator, and Creation.

2. Telling our stories is a kind of soul food & the Church a kind of soul food restaurant  

We’ve heard something about the four food groups — 

Junk Food             tastes great, but makes us sick and fat

Health Food          often doesn’t taste good, might make us healthier,

Good Food           does something good for both our bodies as well as our souls

Soul Food              tastes and feels good, inside, and out,

                              does not make us fat or sick, but rather makes us whole, if not                                         holy,   and brings joy, courage, compassion, gratitude,                                           humility, and love.

Early 19th century: from French, from restaurer ‘provide food for’ (literally ‘restore to a former state’).

The use of the words “soul food” is intentional. The “double entendre” = double hearing is not because either meaning is risqué, but because “soul food”, a significant aspect of Black culture reminds us of our covenant to work against oppression, of all kinds, the over and undervaluing of ourselves and others.

These strategic conversations make for soul food, by hearing, sharing, and honoring each person’s experience.

They are indications that the “gifts of faith, hope and love” are at work among us.

We come here to this soul food restaurant,

to feed, to be fed,/ to nourish each other, to be nourished

to “rest” in God, to be restored, to restore others

to be filled and then sent away with both full hearts and                                                  full stomachs

… by letting each other know something about our needs, i.e.

which questions matter most to us, and then sharing with each other something of how those needs are met, fed in the life of this congregation, we feed each other’s souls with small doses and (demonstrations) of faith, hope, and love.

My Covid Project begins each Monday morning by reading the lessons for the next Sunday, and then continues off and on over the week, as I chew upon, think about, explore the readings in terms of  what the lessons have to offer towards what I saw as my most pressing need for that week.

This is not any great work of scholarship or studiousness, It’s not about being right; it’s more about wanting to be whole, to be restored,  in a difficult time.

It is much more like snacking on little bits here in a way that does something to feed my soul, give me hope, help me to look about and see what I was not seeing… the kind of things that with hindsight I would come to label, later on, as our Psalm says, some of the “great things that God has done for us.”  But that label, isn’t where it starts out.

This spiritual / soul food program begins each week by taking stock… of what my greatest obstacle to – being okay, to being restored — now?

(And that question can become humbling, when week after week, I continue to come up with the same or similar obstacle. But,…so be it. That question is important.

This snacking program is a way of trying to figure out what is getting in the way of  the “faith, hope, and love” that the Collect suggests are gifts “we are given by God, ” and that I’d like to have more present in my life.

3.) This week’s soul food for me

This “program” is Highly flexible. Adjust, adapt, take short cuts… all you like. If you do it at all, it’s just right!!

1. Pick my most pressing challenge for the week

As when my faith, hope, and love are in some kind of battle with my fears, doubts, and despair.

[For me this rotates between the most recent physical ailment or fear

+/or trying to love and get along with someone, I’m not loving very well or getting along with

+/or yet another terrifying awareness of one more horrific event of oppression and injustice

+/or some heart-breaking environmental disaster…

any one of or some combination of all four.]

This question is important because in spite of the fact that we’ve used the same lessons in a 3-year rotation for more than 40 years, we have never yet been posed with exactly the same questions and answers because the context of our lives, of our questions and answers, and our reading these texts is ALWAYS changing

2.) I read through the lessons… rather superficially… i.e. sort of speed reading to see what, if ANYTHING,   in any way, might in some way link up with the challenge I identified.   E.g. It doesn’t have to be “right”…according to anyone else. At this point, it simply needs to fit my need in a way that I understand.     

9 With tears of joy they will come;  while they pray, I will bring them back.

I will lead them by quiet streams&  on smooth paths so they don’t stumble.                                                                                 from  Jeremiah

6 Those who sow with tears      will reap with glad songs.

7 Those who go out weeping,  carrying the seed,

will surely come home again with joy, shouldering their sheaves  from the Ps.

And the conversation between the Blind man, in Mark

 “Jesus, Son of David, show me mercy!” “Son of David, show me mercy!”

           “Call him forward.”   “Be encouraged! Get up! He’s calling you.”

           “What do you want me to do for you?”  “Teacher, I want to see.”

            “Go, your faith has healed you        

3. ) Keep track, however informally, of what I found that fit the need. Maybe write it down, or just highlight the printed text?

4.)  Chew on it for a while What the chewing gave me…  two things:

                  > a beautiful, powerful image of hope to counter act the too many visions of despair that keep showing up for me. An image I keep returning to again and again and again, for hope, vision of something more than what is currently before my eyes, in my heart.

                  > an example, and encouragement of how those who follow Jesus deal with each other to provide soul food to each other and those around them

For one thing, they argued with each other, and also stayed together, changed their minds, and openly encouraged one another.

They asked Jesus for what they needed. …meaning this glimpse of those who followed Jesus  looks more collaborative than I’ve at times come to imagine it.

There are important parts for everyone in the group to play,

something for everyone to hear, to say, to do, to be.

It’s not a story where anyone is sitting, left out in silence, nor does anyone, including Jesus, take over the story telling.  They do not begin in agreement; they disagree…and only after the small group conversation do some of them change their minds, and something new happens.

               The Blind man approached Jesus, not the other way around,

And he openly shouted, in public and asked for what he wanted. Jesus did not assume to know what the guy wanted. He asked, he listened… and when Jesus responded… he “gave the credit” to attributed the sight to the man’s faith rather than his own superpowers.                                                                                                                                                                  5.)  Come back a day or two later, and write a response to God based on what unfolded during the week

One aspect of this snacking program is that it resembles a snack in its incompleteness. It doesn’t pretend to be a full meal.  As important, or true some of this may be, I find it helpful to see this as more of something small along the way, to tide us over until something more filling comes along at a later time. I am more nourished when there isn’t so much pressure to do it right, etc.!!

6.)  Optional. I look up the songs and hymns that we have that go with these lessons, & pick one as a prayer.

The outcome of that step is what you are singing today. Our Episcopal hymnals, all five of them, plus the many hymns that we sing from the ELCA Hymnal are a WIDE range of soul food – we have a lot of hymns to choose from, they are not all alike, they do not all say the same things. It has been very powerful to look through the indexes of these hymnals and see how the many ways in which these texts become beautiful songs, or to realize that some Sundays, there isn’t one single hymn that fits any of the lessons for the day. I had no idea about that.

7.) Find a way to share that song and the prayer with someone else.

This final step… writing this closing prayer and sharing with someone else is a feast for me. Even a little bit of this kind of exchange is a feast… to catch a glimpse of how someone else’s faith, hope and love unfold in their lives, and share some of my own with others is life giving, hope building, connecting…restorative.

4. Conclusion    A Soul Food Snack for this Week

Holy One, here we are, together with You and one another, in this long season of distress; part of a great web of people who look to you with this outrageous hope of going out weeping,

and then coming back home again,

singing, with joy!

Here we sing glad songs together, for the many ways you restore us;

together, here in this place, where the soul food we consume,

          is rich in the compassion, humility, wisdom, joy, and courage

                    of Jesus-like lives;

          and becomes what we offer to the world around us. Alleluia, alleluia, Amen.

          I hope to hear about your Covid.